Certainly you can guess the answer to the title of the blog. It is I. There is a disconnect between what I see in the mirror and reality. I realize this each time I look at a current photo of me. It was actually a glance at such a photo that helped to nudge me (aka kick me in the ass) toward a serious attempt to slim down.
You can check out this picture too, if you are a Facebook friend. I'm at a party, wearing a sleeveless sundress. First, almost NO woman over 50 should wear a sleeveless dress, secondly I as a fatty should have known better. The dress is also quite a fashion statement. Because I have this idea that I will not remain a size 18 for much longer, I have taken to purchasing my "wardrobe" at WalMart. The dress in this picture simply exudes WalMart "fashion" at its finest. It's some hideous, polyester blend with a Hawaiian floral pattern. (I believe that I was sober when I purchased this!) My flabby arms, my enormous bust, my belly and my red face add to the trailer-parkesque aura of the photo.
When did I become the fat lady in the circus? My arms have dimples at the joints! When did I becom my daughter's cat, Jackson. I have this little head on an enormous body. (Sorry, Jackson, but you do have a little head on an enormous body.)
Today I took charge of this body image issue. My gym (Golds' Gym Morton) is having a 12-week challenge. One thing you have to do in order to participate is have your measurements taken and you have to be weighed. I figured this challenge would be right up my alley with my new one day at a time plan, so I was measured and weighed. Due to the shocking nature of the results, I will only share a few of them with you. On the positive side, I weighed a pound less than my January 1, 2012, weight. However, the girth of my thigh was 27 inches. Let's put this in perspective. When I was a senior in high school, my waist measurement was 27 inches.
The bad part of this exercises was that it dismayed, depressed and disgusted me. The positive part of the exercise was that it made it that much easier for me to stick to getting through Wednesday, January 4th!
By the way...I made it through yesterday as well!
Tip for the day: Don't just eyeball a scale or look in the mirror. Have your measurements taken and write them down. It is going to be a motivator for me, I know!
I purchased a new weight loss program right before the new year, and I was surprised to see that the first section of it was all about loving your body, both the way it is now and the way you want it to be. There's actually a lot of meditation involved, and guided visualizations for the future, all of which is meant to make you more connected with your body, and to treat it with love and respect. It will be interesting to see how all of that works out!
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